Message in a Bottle

As I sit here at Swork Coffee House thinking about movies, I realize that what a film is saying is more important than ever, today. Viewers are demanding messages they can relate to. Movies will endure generations after we’re gone, so their messages are really like “time in a bottle,” to later be watched over and over and appreciated. I thought about it, and what my message would be in “Blood Sucking Babes from Burbank” – “If your girlfriend starts rubbing jewels all over herself, strips and grows fangs, don’t try to reason with her – get the hell out of there!” How’s that?

In Curse of the Pink Panties, the message is also clear… “If you’re a model, and evil spirits inhabit your panties… compassion and understanding is sure to work better than trying to destroy the pesky little demons.” (See Photo) After trying everything, Becca plays her guitar and sings a love song she wrote to the tough gangster in her panties, and he zooms out into the air before his head explodes… kill them with kindness! Okay, maybe there’s not a super strong message in these movies. I don’t know what they put in this coffee today... I guess you should look at Cranium Candy Movies by, well… please refer to item #2 in yesterday’s post, “Blood and Guts.”

Actually though, one of the things that worked well in “Babes” is Felicity’s eerie feelings about the attacks – that cannibalism is not as abhorrent as it appears… that in nature, creatures like the black widow spider and the preying mantis devour their mates. Zack is incredulous and sickened hearing Felicity so casually and logically putting this all together. The female eating her mate alive and leaving behind an empty shell blowing in the wind… sounds a little like… marriage! Okay, just kidding there. But that comparison to facts in nature gave this offbeat B-Movie a disturbing base. Seriously, there’s no reason why a fun, wacky comedy or campy horror can’t show you something in a very unique way and make you think.

Okay… In “Curse of the Pink Panties,” one of the girls is so tormented by the demonic little spirit living in her panties, that she douses them with her grandmother’s perfume. This is a clear message about using tacky, flowery perfumes as a weapon… Well, okay, enough of this. I’m putting down the dark coffee right now, and ordering an herb tea. Next post, though, you’re not off the hook… I’m going to tell you about a wacky movie I did 10 years ago, where the message and predictions have all come true in a very scary way.